Stop Apologizing For Existing And Act Like You Belong

I no longer accept apologies unless you’re apologizing for doing me wrong. I’m also no longer giving apologies unless I’ve done you wrong.

Apologizing for anything else is not okay.

Some of you are reading this scratching your heads. Okay, Rach, what are you talking about?

Others know the feeling all too well.

Your story goes on longer than you intended. Sorry.
Your personality quirks are showing. Sorry.
You sit down next to a group of people and you’re not sure if they want you there. Sorry.
You ask someone for help with a big project. Sorry.

You do not owe anyone an apology for:

being you
taking up space
having a conversation
talking too much
not talking enough
having feelings
having needs
breathing
existing

It’s okay to express yourself and your needs. It’s not only okay, but it’s vital to expect people to treat you with respect.

These are not things confident people apologize for. And if you want confidence, you’ve got to start acting like you already have it.

Tell your anxiety to shut up (here are a few great ways to stop your anxiety). You are not a burden and the things you say and do do not require an apology (unless, ya know, what you’re saying or doing is mean). Want to feel like you belong somewhere? Then start acting like you already belong there.

If over-apologizing is something you find yourself doing, I’ve got some news you’re not gonna like. Apologizing for every little thing is usually an attempt to make up for times you’re afraid you’re being annoying.

Guess what? The constant apologizing is actually making you more annoying.

It’s okay- there’s an easy fix for it. Just stop doing it!

Your existence is not an annoyance, so don’t apologize for it.

And if everything you say and do really does annoy those around you, you’re probably not in the right crowd. Doesn’t mean there’s anything wrong with them or with you- not everyone is going to “get” you and not every circle is going to be right for you.

And if you’re not sitting with “your” people, why does it matter what they think?

That’s right, it doesn’t.

Every single one of us is annoying at times. It happens. Your people will still love you anyways.

So from now on, shut down that voice in your head telling you you’re being annoying. Stop apologizing for stupid crap!